letter to the sun, stars and space, infinite

Dear Universe:

I’m giving up on Dan. Yes, I need a living space. Yes, I need it to be really really affordable, given my position at the bottom of the food chain; there are a few other key criteria of which you’re aware too.

Yet, big Universe, this is ridiculous. This waiting for a man who is 44 years old to return a call re: a course of action on which we each agreed. (Five days’ waiting in case you’re counting though I know you’re not for you are without Time. 🙂 )

Calls going ignored and basic courtesy and consideration going neglected are telling about his character and red flags. Though he may be unlikely to go all apeshit like others whose identities you know, truth is that inconsideration, thoughtless and negligence, even from an otherwise reasonable and sane person, have their consequences too. I really can’t have those either.

I understand that a man’s (or woman’s) maturity is not measured by years but inner self.

Nonetheless, I do need a space (and promptly!) and cannot afford much and Dan, despite promising signs, agreement to proceed and rare rental affordability, has been a disappointment. He’s failing to live up to the most basic of elements that connect one human being to another: communication. Never mind nobility and honor! Basic courtesy and decency would be accepted at this point!

Alas it’s not because I want to give up on Dan but am forced to. The need for a move and quickly remains. You know what I need, dear Universe. You know my standards and basic, if not minimalist, needs. And I can’t have them taken away, even when others suggest I should compromise this or give up on that. My needs are barely in the equation as it is! I also can’t have them stomped on any more.

No more battering and bashing, dear Universe!

That is that. Unreliable and irresponsible Dan is released, likewise any “hope” — correction, optimism, a far better and more appropriate word! — of him returning my calls.

It’s in your hands, Universe. I turn this over to you. The right place. In the right way. In accordance with your Light.

Thank you thank you thank you.

a struggling girl without a home,


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