See Martha. See Martha run. See Martha run like the wind!

Not even Martha Stewart could help this kitchen.

Matter of fact, she’d take one look and run fast and run far!

I’ve written of my love for cooking and baking. Matter of fact, I seriously considered going the way of culinary school.

I didn’t so I enjoy expressing my passion as a layman. The kitchen conceptually is for me a center of immense creativity and warmth, grounding and nurturing physically, emotionally and spiritually.

When I imagine my dream home, the kitchen is a main frame in my movie. I can see the cookware, the iron skillets, the quality knives, the butcher block, the mismatched plates and cups that amuse friends and members of my tribe. Yes, I like plates not to match. Call it a quirk, an expression of eccentricity.

Let’s tour the kitchen of which I’ve oft written. It begins innocently enough with a standard fridge in the back corner; it’s old but functions. BTW, the corner of the plant stand there in the right corner marks the kitchen wall, upon which I was plastered to snap the fridge!

Note the esteemed placement of the magnetized bottle opener appropriate for a true beer lover.

The electric stove and boy would I not mind pulling the pulling on it!

Don’t be fooled by the appearance. It’s a reduced-size model to accommodate tight quarters, an Easy-Bake oven, I call it. A standard cookie sheet doesn’t fit; the half-sheet for two bits from a garage sale does.

The oven really sucks. Runs too hot. Even temp adjustments and frequent monitoring won’t save baked goods from the burn. I’ve scraped black bottoms more times than I care to admit. It’s embarrassing when they’re gifts or potluck contributions!

The electric coils are tilted, heat irregularly and burn unevenly, with some portions cool black, others glowing hot orange. Only the front left functions with semi-normalcy so it gets all the use.

Nuthin’ special about the sink:

save this tilt:

which I presume was designed to drain the water. Due to shoddy design, however, it spills onto the floor, hence the perpetual sop-up rag you see sitting there.

Hold onto your hat for the highlight, the counter space!

The wooden spoon and kitchen towel convey the work space:

That’s it. Not pictured are the tired painted walls, chipped paint, worn edges of floorboards, cupboards and drawers wearied by a century of use. No amount of spotless maintenance can restore life or bounce to this kitchen. It’s sad and pathetic and I’m a sad girl for it (not to mention hugely frustrated by pent-up creative energy).

Like I said, not even Martha Stewart could help this kitchen, neither skilled forces from Better Homes and Gardens. Nope, only one fixer is up to the task:



6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. inaformerlifeanexpat
    Jan 07, 2011 @ 15:55:34

    It does look like a tight fit, but then kitchens in Japan, even those in stand alone home are tiny too.


  2. allycatadventures
    Jan 07, 2011 @ 17:34:07

    @Expat – Very true about Japanese kitchens. However, this is America, where things are bigger. Allegedly. 😀


  3. stupido63
    Jan 07, 2011 @ 19:19:30

    The sink and counter look alot like the one which was in our house when we purchased it. Our kitchen also had the water heater in it too.


    • allycatadventures
      Jan 08, 2011 @ 15:52:12

      @stupido63 – Ahhh, so you must’ve been in an old place too. Ahhh, the ol’ water heater issue! Been there! At one place with uber minimum storage, the heater was in the closet and ate up half the space. That was “easily” overlooked, however, in view of the rental’s 1970’s burnt orange shag carpet reeking of cat pee!


  4. ladywise
    Jan 08, 2011 @ 08:10:02

    Oh, bless your heart. I’ve spent my share of time in kitchens like this and had some much worse. You definitely keep it clean and that’s the big thing. My mother always said, “You can make any house a home” and it looks like you’ve done that in spite of the pitfalls.


    • allycatadventures
      Jan 08, 2011 @ 15:44:19

      @ladywise – Long time no see. 🙂 Yes, some consider me a neat freak. A dust bunny makes headline news! As for being able making any house a home, that simply isn’t true. Perhaps one day I’ll blog on that topic. In the meantime, I’m not sure how you came to the conclusion that I’ve made this into a home. This space is anything but! I dread coming through the doors and being here is torture. Home this isn’t.


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