Ever see a bull with fins for feet?

I'm a Taurus in disguise … the Bull under wraps … the undercover operative of the second sign of the Zodiac.

I lie. I'm not a Taurus (though my Mars is there); I'm Neptune's baby standing solidly on watery terrain — an impossibility that might explain my charming neuroses quirks.

Astrology's one of my passions, and while I read Cancer forecasts and material when I'm out an' about floating in the nebulous ocean that is the worldwide web, because Cancer's my rising sign, I've observed in the past year or two that Taurus info has hit the nail on the head, often and consistently. So when I probed that curiosity, I discovered various planets had progressed into Taurus (progressed planets, an astro phenomenon), a viable explanation for this fish in bull's clothing.

So I had to chuckle over the latest forecast at Free Will astrology, by the irreverent and witty Rob Brezsny. Read it and tell me that I'm not a Taurus bull with fins for feet:

Verticle Oracle card TAURUS (April 20-May 20)
The average person changes residences 11 times in the course of his or her life. Having lived in 33 different homes so far, I'm way above the norm. What about you, Taurus? I'm guessing that you will either make a major move in the coming year, or else you will find your true spiritual home. Here's a third possibility: You may penetrate more deeply into your existing abode, transforming it from a place of shelter to a sublime sanctuary — re-imagining it and reinventing it and reinhabiting it with an intensity that amazes you.

(editor's notes: 11 times? who the hell has only 11 residences? freaks of nature, all! um, a definite nyet to third possibility.)

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